There are people willing to support you, just let them know.
Good communication is key to nurturing healthy relationships with mates, whānau (family), at school, socially and at work.
Talking helps us process thoughts and feelings and reach out for help when we need it. We can do that with all sorts of people: mates, a family member, a school teacher, a church minister, a helpline, or a sports coach. We need to talk to let others know what we’re going through.
Talking is really important if you’re feeling low – it can help you get out of your head and remind you that things aren’t as bad as they seem. Strong communication within families is a protective factor and makes us resilient during tough times.
If you’re not really up to talking about your problems to someone, you can do something where you don’t have to talk, like watching a movie or going to a gig with them.
Aunty Dee’s tips for talking
Putting on a brave face can be hard. But you don’t always have to, some days just leave your face out of it and email, message or text. If you haven’t talked to someone for a while, sending them a message keeps you connected – and you might end up feeling better when you’re not up for meeting up with them.
If you’re feeling down, make a call. Especially if you don’t feel like getting out of the fale (house), call a supportive friend or someone from your whānau. It can actually make you feel better, no matter how bad things seem right now. And if you don’t feel like talking about what’s getting you down – let them do all the talking. It can distract you from the things going on, and it’s nice to know someone cares.
Catching up for coffee or lunch can be a great way to connect. It might open up a chance to talk about the things you need to talk about. Send a trusted friend a text and jack it up asap.
- Practice talking when you don’t have problems
If you talk about things a lot and it is normal to have open communication about your feelings and about what’s going on in your life, it can be a lot easier to talk about the hard stuff. Then when things stress people out, like peer pressure or bullying, it can be much easier to talk about it
- Talking freely with someone who doesn’t know you
Sometimes it really helps to talk to someone who is a stranger, who you feel won’t judge you. There are a lot of numbers you can call where you can talk to a friendly, non-judgemental expert. Someone that will just listen to what’s going on for you or who can help you with problems that you might have.